We have had a number of conversations over the years on this subject, so I wasn't totally taken aback. So I told her our story - making sure to make it as much about her as about me. Usually that satisfies her, but for whatever reason, she really wanted to talk it over this time. She talked about how she would like to see her "bookmark" parents someday (her way of saying birth parents.) And she wanted to talk again about what it was like when she and I saw each other for the first time.
I just felt like this was a special time, so I ran downstairs and brought up a big bag...it had all the clothes she had on when they handed her to me (and there were a lot of them!) It also had some little gifts and tokens the orphanage had give her. And a little bag of dirt I had scooped up and put in a pouch at the spot where Emma was left.
I had never shown her any of this stuff before...it just never seemed to be the right moment. But this time, it did. She was really fascinated by it all, especially a little necklace the orphanage had given her with the Chinese symbol for "good luck."
I know some adoptive parents get really freaked out when their kids want to talk about where they came from. But this was a great experience for the two of us. Maybe the conversations will get more difficult down the line, but so far, she seems to be processing it well.
Anyway, here's a picture I took today of my girl...have a nice weekend, everyone!
6 comments:
Oh, wow. Thanks for sharing this. I love that you are willing to share since we are a few years behind you and Emma. Such a sweet conversation. It made me emotional.
Tiffany
What a touching moment...I look forward to sharing such times with my kiddo.
Love this post...
So glad you had a great talk...
LOVE the picture of Emma... she is simply beautiful..
inside and out.. and mommy has raised her to be soooo beautiful...
Have a Great Sunday..
At least she didn't say, "why was I adopted." Seems that would be the harder question. I can tell Glenys over and over why I adopted her but not why was she up for adoption (at least not without crying). Thanks for sharing, like Tiffany, I need to know how to proceed when asked too.
beverly
Thanks for sharing. Jordan hit one of those moments a couple of weeks ago but it involved a lot of sobbing on her part (and some crying on my own) as she wanted to know why her birthparents left her and why she may never know who they are. But it ended well with my suggesting she write them a letter to let them know how she felt. We are also going to honor her birthmother this Mother's day. She has never wanted to before but really grabbed onto the idea when I suggested it again.
What a great sharing time you and Emma had. You are a great example to me how I should handle this when Tate asks the big question. I never thought of scooping dirt from the finding spot. Another great idea! She is so beautiful!
Lisa
Post a Comment